Yawn

All I can think of is sleeping. Going to bed. Will post something interesting eventually.

Gregsta'

More Catchy's!

I've got one liners and two liners I use on a regular basis. You, too can be like Gregster - full of wit, humor and awkward moments. Try these responses on your friends when they ask the following questions:

Have you seen [insert famous hot chick name] lately?
Not really. She won't talk to me anymore after that whole stalking incident.

You look tired.
I'm not tired. Strung out, perhaps.

When was the last time you went to the doctor?
Yesterday. It was awful. Doc says I have something called Sars. Ever heard of it?

Why the long face?
My short one is in the shop.

Any chance I can have you stop by my place and fix my computer?
Only if you stop by my place and pull weeds, mow the lawn, prune the shrubs and clean out the gutters.

How do you tell your twin cats apart?
One screams louder than the other when kicked.

Is it really necessary to have two robot vacuum cleaners?
Not really, but it's fun to watch them bump into each other.

Do you want another drink?
Seeing as how I'm an alcoholic and the glass in front of me is empty, I suspect the answer will be yes. I'll check with my people and have them get in touch with your people.

How come you don't go to church on Sunday?
For the same reasons I don't go to lectures on the existence of Extraterrestrial beings.


Gregsta

Skipped a day!

I skipped a day of posting to this site. That's like sinning in Hell, right? Kinda bad, but really, you're guilty of all sorts of other things, so it's kind of moot. Right?

Gotta run.

Gregsta

UPDATE - 3:50am: I don't like pizza, cake and soda. It makes me get up in the middle of the night and type blog entries and suffer heart burn. It's like work, but with a little more pain and suffering thrown in there. Happy Birthday to cousin Emily and congrats to cousin Jacob on graduating High School. I wish I could sleep. Ugh. Gregsta: awake

Rama

I figured out how to make Turkey Burgers taste good.

Use a Meat Smoker.

20 minutes in the smoke box and a cooked the rest of the way on the ol' searin' grill. Mmmm, mmmm! Good stuff. Lets face it - ground turkey is pretty flavorless. Without some help, you might as well be eating a tofu burger with the added cruelty of a dead bird.

Betsy is in the final weeks of classes and begins her Externship soon. What's an Externship? I'm glad you asked! An externship is like an internship - but instead of bringing the doctor coffee and watching other people work, you yourself are actually doing the job you were trained to do.

I've been trying to make my laptop, well, more portable - enabling Hibernate, cleaning things up so it runs faster, installing updates - you know, the kind of thing that one should do with their computer. I'm trying so hard not to be disenchanted with technology. So much of it right now has more to with so called Security rather than innovation.

I did have two wow moments today - I tried out Desktop HD video conferencing with two different services. Very neat stuff. I held a nearly hour long conversation with a guy in San Francisco over the internet and another for 30 minutes with a lady in San Diego. I'm still amazed at how well it worked.

The days are getting warmer (FINALLY). We're biking more and enjoying a little more light into the evening these days.

Gregsta'

Consistency

There is this realization that I've come to regarding the people I know: They're all lunatics, including me.

While this realization doesn't help me sleep at night per se, it does help me cope with the inherent oddness that is the people I know. This is where I would normally cite examples and more or less prove my point. Today, however, I'm in a "don't feel like explaining it" mood.

Makes for a quick blog post. Hectic day today.

Gregsta'

Riddle me this

Why is it that bicycles are so uncomfortable and require so much adjusting? The answer I seek is one of elitism or conspiracy theory. Anything else will be rejected as an explanation.

Going to try and make my bicycle comfortable today. Not sure how this is going to play out. I suspect either a trip to the spandex store or a purchase of a fat guy seat. Let's pray for the latter.

Maybe I'm just a fat guy with a bony butt.

Ha.

Gregsta': Weekend Edition

Exhaustion

Staying home today. Watching DVR, blog posting, napping and doing whatever I want for a change. Only for a moment. Back to work tomorrow.

Gregsta'

Quiet Sanctity

I'm sitting here in the home office, enjoying the breeze from the ceiling fan and some Toto on my noise cancelling headphones. It's like being on a deserted beach with Wi-Fi.

Leaving the office early is fun. Particularly when you make a habit of going in early every frickin' day.

The site has been devoid of any meaningful content for some time now. I thought this might be a good opportunity to talk a little bit about marriage, since old Gregster is getting married in August.

Call Betsy and I old fashioned, but we're both troubled by some of the relationships we see today - polyamourous (aka swingers) seems to be the relationship du jour. I read an article on MSN that highlights the relationships of 9 different couples. Most of them were pretty standard, but the third one was just disturbing. Marriage is about commitment. Sleeping around isn't commitment. Weak.

I for one look forward to this idea of committing. Most single guys avoid commitment. I guess I was wired to seek it out. When I was dating back in the day, I was looking for someone to settle down with. It's still what I want. In the last few months of being legally "Single", I'm excited about this next step in life. I've seen a lot of divorces happen over the years. I don't see that in our future.

Perhaps I'm just a lucky individual that found the right person. Maybe it was fate. There's even the possibility that it's some combination of both. Whatever it is, I'm very grateful.

Gregsta: Off to Dinner

IMHO

I like high gas prices. I dig high taxes. Social Medicine? Bring it!

Gotta run. Republican mob on my tail...

Gregsta'

Tickets: Purchased

It's official: We've got our tickets to Costa Rica for our Honeymoon.

Now I just need to figure out where we're staying. I hear the streets aren't a great place to stay.

Gregsta: Fuera

Sweet

You know, I can't think of anything to write about in the short period of time I have to work with here before heading off to work. I've got about 5 good rants stored up that will all take many hours to pound out and many more to edit down.

I guess I'm off the hook for this morning's creative expelling.

Gregsta: Off to Work

Strange World

I live in this little bubble where Architecture is more than just designing big dildos and the news is, for the most part, irrelevant. You can understand then my amazement when I read that Child Porn is a big problem - and now a technologists problem.

What the fuck, people? I've got an idea - why don't we pass a law that flat out says that Child Pornographers are just executed when found guilty of possession? Sick, sick, sick. I can't believe that there are people out there like that.

Another "What the Fuck!?" moment: Digital TV mandate. I'm sorry, TV in Portland has been channel 2, 6, 8, 10 and 12 (and sometimes 49) just fine for 20 years. DON'T FUCK WITH IT. Sure, I'm on Satellite, but it wasn't always that way. How dare the FCC hand over the airwaves for other uses? Fuck them. They've way overstepped their authority and place.

I like swearing. Can you tell?

I about fell out of my chair when I read this. Mad props, Gooch.

Time to do some real work.

Gregsta'

When the Day is Done

Chaos.

That sums up my day.

Gregsta': Exhausted

For Real!

It's 7:30 on Sunday. I've just finished sleeping for 12 hours. It was perhaps the greatest thing I've done all week. Never mind the coordinating, reconnecting and moving back of the entire downtown office (2 floors). Forget about the 24-hours-in-2-days marathon work ethic. Disregard my enthusiasm to change the world to think more like me. Nope - I gots' me 12 hours of sleep. Aww yeah.

Now that I've effectively slept through what would have been dinner last night, I'm about ready to go grab some grub. Mmmm. Breakfast on Sunday... Eggs Bennedict... [insert sounds of shameless carnivorous drooling]

Major Props: Gooch and Brett for helping out at the office yesterday. A true show of professionalism and ass-kicking.

Gregsta'

Catchy Catch Phrase

I need a new standard responses to common questions. I've worn out the old ones:

How are you today?
Living the dream! Somebody's dream. Not mine, though. This one is far more masochistic than I could ever have dreamed up.

I have a question for you.
I have an answer for you, though you might not like it.

Do you have a moment?
For you, chances are good. The next guy might not be so lucky.

Did you see the episode of [insert tv show name here] last night?
Nope. I can barely handle the reality show that is my life. The cameras poking into the shower are particularly disconcerting.

When are you available?
I would tell you, but a little person just stole my calendar book and headed for the bathroom in a panic. I suspect I'm free now.

Why does your lip curl on one side?
Why do you S..ss....ss...Stutter?

Does that thing get good mileage (referring to our Hybrid car)?
As long as I'm not being chased by a wild pack of people asking me how my gas mileage is, it's pretty good.

When are you going to [insert capitalist upgrade - such as buy a bigger house]?
Probably never. Things are going to hell, so I'm just going to maintain my way of life long enough for it to become considered royalty.

Why is my computer making that funny sound?
It's probably the midget inside. If he gets a hold of a hammer, he likes to make lots of noise.

My phone isn't working. I never get calls.
I don't think it's your phone.



Responsively,
Gregsta'

Jeeb. Us.

Two accidents in one month's time.
This is nuts. Clearly someone from the Autobody industry has decided that we're to be the targets as of late. This time, Bets' got hit by someone who ran a stop sign. Everyone is okay, but this is getting frustrating now. I don't like being a regular customer to the body shop. It's a kin to being a regular at the Candy, Bread and Cheese store.

The weekend will not be relaxing.
While all of you will be enjoying the Grand Floral Parade, yours truly (with the esteemed help of my colleagues and Mad-Skills-Gooch) will be reconnecting about 100 computers at my office in Downtown Portland. A weekend lost to a, um, cause.

Time to go. Breakfast (in the form of a Cliff Bar) is calling my name.

SlavingMyAssForTheMan,
Gregsta'

Cleany McCleanerson

Ah, the sight of a clean room in the house. Devoid of unfiled papers, corners of unread magazines and unnecessary computer parts in the open. It's truly a spectacle to behold. Our office is nearly as clean as the first day we started using it.

I got my car back on Friday. I at first couldn't remember which side had been repaired. I was disappointed at their work at first. Then I remembered, went around to the repaired side and was pleased to see their handy work looked better than when it came off the showroom floor. It's nice to have things back to normal again.

We took in the Starlight parade yesterday from the 2nd floor of my downtown office. It was lots of fun. I think this was the first time we've caught the Starlight as opposed to the Grand Floral parade. We were joined by Betsy's sister and boyfriend. Good times. Probably the most wholesome, family oriented type of fun I'll have all month.

Quickly, I'm becoming one of those people that organizes everything in sight. Today, we emptied our junk drawer (you know, that drawer of crap in the kitchen?) and splayed it all out on the counter. In the end, we kept the following items in the drawer, in a special tray separate from the rest of the drawer:

• Spare House Keys
• Calculator (smallish)
  
• 2 pens, 2 pencils and 2 pads of paper
• Lighter & matches
• Flashlight (compact, of course)

That's it! Nothing else. Everything else was either thrown out or put in it's proper place. We'll probably use the rest of the drawer as a lateral file of recipe cards or kitchen gadgets. I was inspired by a discussion last night where we were talking about a good friend that's a hoarder. Reportedly, she's bad enough that we're thinking about sending a video to Oprah to see if Peter Walsh can help.

Running out of steam now. I've been cleaning house since 1:00 this afternoon. It's almost time for a night cap and the evening paper.

Gregsta'